Why Smart Leaders Get Defensive ... Even When They Know Better

You already know this moment

It happens before you decide anything.

Nobody sees the pressure. They only see how you react.

01 · IN THE MEETING
Someone on your team barely opens their mouth about your decision and you’re already in a 3‑point stance, defending it.

In your headI’m just giving context.

What they seeNot a team
player.
02 · IN THE 1:1
Your boss asks a fair question about the numbers. You then walk him through every decision and every reason why for the next 20 minutes.

In your headI’m just giving clarity.

What they seeAlways has
excuses.
03 · AT HOME
It started with a comment about the dish in the sink. 10 minutes later it’s World War III, and you don’t know what you are fighting about.

In your headI didn’t do anything wrong.

What they seeDoes not
value me.

You knew better. It happened anyway.

If awareness was enough, you’d have changed your reactions by now. But ... what you don’t retrain, you reinforce. And every repetition makes it stronger.

Your repeated reactions become your reputation.

Your reactions teach your team to work with you or around you.

What you’ll walk away with

In 60 minutes, you’ll get:

Why it happens before you can think.Your brain learned to see certain situations as dangerous.
What your defensiveness is protecting.A trigger is a gift. It tells you what you value. Most people never find that out.
Which Pressure Reflexes show up for you.Defensiveness may not be the only one.
What it’s costing you.At work, at home, and in your reputation.
What it takes to retrain it.Catching it isn’t the same as changing it.

Free · Wednesday, October 28 · 11:00 AM Central / 12:00 PM Eastern / 9:00 AM Pacific

In their words

Leaders who did the work.

“Weeks prior, in the same situations I was feeling inadequate, defensive, and stressed. No more of that.”

Andrew PettitStrategic Advisor & Board Member, Palantir alum
“Deano’s approach to coaching has pushed me beyond my previous limits for personal growth and career achievement many times and helped focus me on healthy personal and business relationships.”

Gary PearlExecutive Producer, “Jane the Virgin”
“That transformation alone has already repaid the coaching fee many times over.”

Bryan VoughtBiology Leader, Organoid + Stem Cell Innovation

Your host

Deano Sutter

Founder of Pressure Reflex™ Leadership Training System

“Your reactions may not be who you are on the inside, but they’re what people will remember about you from the outside.”

Most people think they have a knowledge, strategy or execution problem. Nope.

You have a recalibration problem.

I’ve done this work with executives for almost a decade. It’s also how I got through taking care of my mom, the story many of you followed on LinkedIn.

Before you sign up

Fair questions.

Is this about work or home?

Yes ... it’s both. You may try to compartmentalize work from home or social, but your brain doesn’t. What happens in one will show up in others. When you retrain in one you retrain in all.

Do I have to share anything?

There is no requirement, but you should make sure to bring 2 moments for yourself. Share or don’t share ... it doesn’t matter. We just want you prepared.

Will there be a replay?

Yes there will be. We are all adults and understand things come up in our busy lives. So if you miss it live, feel free to watch it later. But it’s only accessible for 5 days after ... so don’t dawdle.

One live session

Once you see it, you can’t unsee it.

Oct28Wednesday

11:00 AM Central
12:00 PM Eastern · 9:00 AM Pacific
60 minutes, live on Zoom
Free

Bring 2 moments from this last week where you reacted in a way you’d prefer not to. You won’t have to share them.

Join me live

Free. Just your name and email. You add it to your calendar on the next page.